


Unicorns and computer programing

by maikomenagerie



Series: Agents not of S.H.I.E.L.D [2]
Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Backstory, Darcy learns computers, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-10
Updated: 2014-04-10
Packaged: 2018-01-18 21:20:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1443385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maikomenagerie/pseuds/maikomenagerie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Darcy learns about computers. This is a short follow up to The Meaning of Family, It will make no sense if you haven't read that one!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unicorns and computer programing

**Author's Note:**

> Soooo, hi? I had a ton of plans for this series, and a lot of them are still out there some where, just set on the back burner for now. I had to take a break because Real life happened and I just needed some time, which kind of turned into me not having any motivation to write; when I went to look at some stuff that I had started I just wasn't happy with it. A lot of it felt contrived and inauthentic, so I'm taking some time to rework my thought into something useable. But for now, here is a short, unbeta-ed, oneshot, just something silly that I felt like writing.

      In all the ways that matter, life is a bitch; it’s a simple truth that is actually quite comforting to Darcy. That might sound strange, but one of the long lasting life lessons imparted to her by her Grams was that the only way to deal with a bitch, is to be one right back. “Eventually the better bitch comes out on top Darcy, and that had better be you!” Grams had had a unique world view.

 

      “As much as I love hearing about your Grams, Darce, I really have to get this work done, and if you want to talk about a bitch, then take a look at this code! Blya bol' v zadnitse.” Andre had very little sympathy for Darcy.

 

       “Ty tseluyesh' svoyu mat' s etim rtom?” The rude hand gesture was response enough for Darcy to continue on her rant. “I just think it’s fairly hilarious that Grams would have made such an effective politician, ya know? Pretty much everything we learn in political theory is exactly like what she used to tell me.”

 

       “I doubt any of your books use the word bitch quite so many times.” Came the muffled response, Andre now had his head firmly planted on his desk, the blue and white light from his computer screen illuminating his head and slumped shoulders like a taunting spot light.

 

       “Paraphrasing,” was her blithe reply. “If they did, I bet you more students would actually pay attention.”

 

        This got a response, “Huh, I doubt it! These people pay ridiculous amount of money to be here, and all they do is drink and fuck around all night so that they can sleep in class. How do you do that?!?” Andre, like his mother, had no time for slackers, a trait that Darcy mostly appreciated, unless she was trying to sleep in, in which case; she had no time for Andre. “It’s like homework is some mythical concept to them too!”

 

        “Ah, the elusive homework unicorn, only visible to those who believe in the power of love, and that your GPA isn’t a figment of the professors imagination.” They shared a quick laugh before settling in for more work. Well, Andre settled in, Darcy continued to look board.

 

        When he noticed this, Andre turned his full attention to her. “Speaking of the unicorn, is there a reason you’re not ‘searching’ for it right now? You know, instead of hanging upside down on my bead?”

 

        “All my unicorns have been caught for the week.” She replied.

 

        “All of them?”

 

         “I have nothing but old teachers, and old teachers have their lesson plans down, really the class syllabi are like works of art.” 

 

           He gave snot at this and looked pensive for a moment. “How ‘bout you help me with mine then?” At that Darcy rolled off the bed to sit right side up.

 

            “Andre, lyubimyy, have you forgotten that I’m a political science major?” The question was asked in a sugary sweet voice, dripping in contrived condescension. “And that you are the one majoring in the hard sciences?”

 

          Rolling his eyes, but looking otherwise undeterred, the behemoth of a boy simply rolled his computer chair to the side before getting up to retrieve a collapsible plastic chair from across the freakishly small dorm room. Darcy did not do folding chairs though, good thing there was such a nice rolling computer chair currently not in use. “Computer science, Darce, and we both know you could be too.”

 

          Donning her sweetest smile when Andre turned back around, which promptly turned more devious when fueled by the narrowed eyed look he gave her (had he really expected anything less? Silly man) she replied, “Still, I can’t even program a VCR, so how can I help you with all this code- stuff?”

 

            “Okay, one, VCR Darce, what is this? The 90’s? And two, I’m sure you could if you tried, but you never have. I’ll start from the beginning, it’ll be good review for me.” He settled in next to her at the desk and began sorting through old files.

 

           “Sure, you get review and access to my genius, but what exactly do I get out of this?”

 

            “The ability to hack the pentagon,” he deadpanned. “Just think, you can topple the government without ever having to take another political theory class.”

 

             “I promise to make you vice emperor of the new republic.”

 

              “Such a benevolent overlord.”

 

              “And don’t you forget it.”

 

 

Russian:

Blya bol' v zadnitse- Fucking pain in the ass.

Ty tseluyesh' svoyu mat' s etim rtom- you kiss your mother with that mouth?

Lyubimyy- favorite, term of endearment.

**Author's Note:**

> Reviews make my world a happy place!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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